Monthly Archives: March 2010

Whining and Dining

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At 36 weeks, I’ll admit to doing too much of these two things. Let’s start with dining cos it’ll probably be a quicker write.

I’ll have to share a little biology lesson so that we’re all on the same page. By 36 weeks, the uterus which was the size of an apricot lying at the lower abdomen before pregnancy, would have stretched all the way to just below the ribcage, squishing up every other organ. The all important organ (when it comes to dining), the stomach, is unable to expand as much as it could before because it’s all squished up. The implications are that eating a normal sized meal is only possible if you don’t mind gasping for breath afterwards. What to do? Take small meals across the day.

It is important to me that my small meals sound healthy and packed with nutrients because then I’ll feel like a responsible mother – anything that helps the emotional well being of the mother-to-be must be good! So we try to stock up on anything that says “Multigrain” or “Fortified with <insert vitamin>.

It’s also fortunate that my good doctor has given me plenty of vitamins to take and I try to take them nightly because you guessed it – that sounds responsible. Besides, if I take my vitamins before I sleep, Renee would have some source of food the 10hrs 8hrs I’m not eating. (Disclaimer: This has zero medical grounds, but it makes me feel clever for having thought it and feeling clever must contribute too, to my the well being of the mother to be =) )

Now onto the whining: (I hope you didn’t think the above was it!)

Where do I start. Hm… I have a few things that are on repeat the entire day. Like how my fingers are swollen and hurt when I clench them; Or how I keep having to go to the toilet; Or how waddling is a poor alternative to walking; Or how I have no clothes to wear cos everything makes me look like I’m trying to hide a beach ball under my clothes.

The man has gotten this practiced look of empathy down to an art and displays it every time I start on any of the above. He’s even got these sounds (goes something like “hmmm….” and “orh.…”) that somehow comes across as consoling when I’m whining. The applications of work at home – amazing. Some days when I’m feeling big hearted, I can’t decide if I’d rather be in my shoes or his. Hurhur

Then family will come by, sometimes bearing gifts for Renee, and always bearing smiles. The excitement they express for a new member of the family reduces my whining to a whittle. I’m smiling rather idiotically when they bring us baby booties and doll sized clothes cos it’s just surreal that I’ll have one of my very own dolls to play dress up with a baby in a very short time.

I think that’s how other mothers deal with every inconvenience. They focus on the joy. Think I’ll go rummage thru Renee’s drawers and ooh and aah at little clothes =)

Mar4_a

Look what pretty booties Uncle Michael bought for Renee!

Some Ways I Spend My Pregnant Days

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1. Read up on pregnancy since forewarned is forearmed.  When I get bored have already read the ‘proper books’, I google for new information. Some websites (I signed up with babycenter.com) provide a day by day progress chart but every time I open that page, my eyes cannot help but continue reading the next day’s progress and before I know it, I’ve finished the entire month’s worth of progress. Better to wait for emails of weekly updates because that way, I remember which week of pregnancy I’m at.

Note of advice : Do not google “Horror birth stories” or “Things that can go wrong during birth”. It does not make one feel forearmed in anyway.

Mar3_a
I find this very helpful.

2. Stare at tummy. Admittedly, every other alien or exorcist type movie has given a bad name to anything that moves inside of a human body. It still feels very foreign to me when I look at my tummy move/wobble when Renee wriggles or kickboxes.  At the earlier stages, these movements felt more like they were my intestines doing a reshuffle. But now, it’s obviously another being because I can feel her knobby knees/elbows/fist or maybe it’s a head/back/butt. I worry at times that she’ll be born bruised all over cos we keep pressing down on the bits that surfaces. Generally, this is more fun during the later stage of pregnancy.

Note of advice: Although it’s fun to share the experience, the novelty might wear out sooner than later for your spouse. Especially if you ask him to touch your tummy every 5mins cos you felt baby move but the moment his hands are on your tummy there’s NADA (This will happen frequently). Or if you insist that he stares at your tummy with you for extended periods of time.

Mar3_b

No, that’s not my belly and I’m not sure if it’s a photoshopped one.  But it happens.

3. Make travel plans. Travelling is a big thing with me and the man. We had initially thought that we’d have to do ALL the traveling before having a baby because travelling with a baby sounded like mission inconvenient impossible.  A couple of weeks ago, we decided to start planning for a holiday and targeted our travel date for 6mths after Renee arrives. Interestingly enough, we realized that if we omit trips we’re unlikely to take anyway, like roughing it out in deserts / go hiking / visit countries with extreme weather conditions, it is still possible to travel! I don’t know why it took so long for that shoe to drop but see? The mind is all about adapting to new situations and conditions.

Mar3_c

4. Write. I write because writing is a form of purging for me. It is better that my thoughts are left somewhere other than in my head, meaning they usually end up in a word file or in cyberspace. (No, I do not keep a diary cos my handwriting is really ugly I’ve forgotten the ancient art of writing). If I do not do housekeeping with my thoughts, I sometimes go through the same things and come to the same conclusion that I’ve arrived at the last time I thought about it. Absolute waste of time isn’t it?

Going out is another option but I find that 70% of the time I’m out, I’m looking for restrooms (pregnant people need the restroom All the time). Since I’m not in a hurry to publish a book on where all the toilets are in Singapore, I think staying home is more comfortable and convenient.

Surely you can see now why I write more.

On Taking Pregnancy Pictures…. (Part II)

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PP_montage1

Yay! Some pictures arrived in my inbox today : ) There were many fun and funny moments during the shoot so here’s sharing…

Thank you Triston and Ant for a fabulous job!! I still can’t believe we’ve known each other for almost 9years!!

If you’re looking to capture precious moments, you might wanna check out Triston’s portfolio at http://www.tri-angles.sg/ - I especially love the section “Around The World II” under portfolios.

On Taking Pregnancy Pictures…. (Part I)

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The thought of taking pregnancy pictures didn’t even cross my mind until a few weeks ago (ie: rather late in the pregnancy). It may have to do with the fact that photo shoots feel like work to me, so if it’s not necessary, why do it? :p I didn’t even want (studio)wedding pictures taken because it felt like too much work I thought that those taken on the actual day would be enough. I still pull out that folder to look at occasionally because it makes me very happy remembering the day our families and friends celebrated with us. It really was such fun!

While I think I’m unlikely to look back at pregnancy pictures and think “What fun!”, I hear I might change my mind because some think pregnancy IS fun in comparison to everyday life with a newborn.I’ll check back on this when Renee arrives :)

I saw some really nice pregnancy pictures of my friends on facebook, and that got me thinking : Would I like a momento of the time my waist looked like a balloon? I mean, it is a miracle that the skin can stretch so! I know I’ve been very blessed to only be experiencing swollen fingers and toes at week 34. Water retention usually sets in earlier than later so I’m thankful for Any reprieve! Oh and fyi, drinking water really does help in reducing water retention – a concept difficult for me to grasp cos I wouldn’t be eating more if I wanted my body to stop retaining calories, would I?

Anyway, I’m digressing so back to the pregnancy pictures. I called a friend and asked if he did pregnancy portraits since he does a great job with weddings – he said it isn’t his main line of business but would be glad to experiment. Yippee!

I was a little uncomfortable at the start of the shoot, when I had to stand under the lights in my yoga looking pants and a tube top. Contributing to that was firstly my balloon of a waist. And then there’s this little nose sticking out of it. I was tempted to give it a name but was afraid it’d stick around if it had a name. Dan wanted to give it a face – y’know, like draw eyes above it and a smiley beneath it. That got him a good glare.

 It’s my belly button. I miss my old one which was an innie. A good, unobtrusive innie. Then it went and grew right along with the belly and it’s now a way outie. I guess it’s more befitting of its button namesake but it really is a pet peeve with me. So much so I’d wear clothes with prints, or clothes that were really loose so the bump on the smooth contour of my belly wouldn’t be obvious. Yes, I do know it’s irrational but that’s a pregnancy privilege (right along with being able to eat/not eat anything, not carry groceries or get up to get that next drink *smug smile)

It’s a good thing that both my friend and his partner (first meeting with this guy!) are both fathers. They weren’t squeamish about/around a pregnant woman, and understood irrational fears and peeves. Plus after them throwing about pregnancy stories and parenting tips, I felt very much better quickly – even about my belly button. See? Confronting your fears really does make them go away.

I asked Dan to be in the pictures with me and his first question was “Do I have to show my pregnancy too?” – that earned him a big big laugh. My funnyman really does make me happy. Like Ha Ha sorta happy almost everyday. I think that’s good for baby and good for us :)

Was waiting for pictures to upload with this post (shoot was done 2nd week of Mar), but my photographer’s still out of town. Will post pics once they come in!

Counting Down!

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It’s week 33 of being pregnant and really, one of the first things I wish I knew (although it wouldn’t change a thing) would be that the entire duration of pregnancy is more 10 months than 9. It is all about expectations, isn’t it?

On that topic, many have asked if we expect to have 2.1 babies after 2 years of dating and 2 years of being married – just so we’re right up there with the statistics we read about. For the record, it is an honest coincidence that we did date for two years and that we are now married for two years…..

Up till Chinese New Year last year, Dan and I were still giving patronizing polite smiles when asked when number 1 will be arriving. Fact is, our (brief) conversations about future offsprings always end up with discussions on a(nother) long holiday or a new hobby – it’s almost like an unending Things To do check list before we will reach Number 865276 : Being Parents.

To be really honest, we had at some point thought we’d be ok if we didn’t have children at all. We had this mental picture of us being a cute old couple, home with 3 cats, always holding hands and maybe playing ping pong (no, not at the same time).

There wasn’t a specific  “OM” moment of enlightenment for us. I think several things conspired to make us think. There was my annual checkup with my gynaecologist. I gave her the same polite smile when she asked if we had plans for babies (My suspicious mind is sure of her vested interest when it comes to affairs of the womb). She gave me a clean bill of health and then sat me down to give me a detailed breakdown of the possible complications for both mother and child with every year that we wait to have a baby (no, I also didn’t request for the talk).

I remember paying more and more attention as she told me the direct relation between maternal age and risk of chromosomal abnormalities. That is, my child risks a higher chance of Down Syndrome / other abnormalities as I age.  She also casually included risks to the mother(me!), the increased chances of a miscarriage, recovery from birth, and other complications that could arise.

Ok…. I think that was when the whole replacing “Being Parents” with other more fun activities started looking like it may not work out so well in the long run. And I think that was when I finally heard the ticking clock. The one I’ve heard others talk about but never thought applied to me because living in denial is all a matter of getting used to and I am :p

There is a difference between having the option to have a baby when I want to, and not being able to, or having to worry about a whole lot of tests.

Like I said, the biological clock (and textbook fears) was by no means the total reason for us deciding to be parents. It really is too long to fit in an entry so let me continue with this later.

Back to guzzling milk and feasting on erm.. let’s see, this week’s cravings include ice cream, cookies and cakes. The burgeoning tummy is a great camouflage Another 7 weeks to go!

Mar1_a

Waiting area at my gynae’s. This is what Dan does when he’s bored.- experiment with our camera’s funky functions.

Mar1_b

This is what I do every visit. (Pic taken in Dec ’09).

Mar1_c

And I’m usually all smiles before any visit cos I’ll be seeing Renee!! :)